"Not" the reason

*posted from my drafts just because*

I recently was able to go to a friend's house and paint their nails before they went on a trip. I brought all my colors and my sparkles and the whole caboodle. And then they got the make their choices. One went with a pale pink and the other a sparkly pink. (Origional I know, but that's not the point.) 

The thought for this post came when my friend, debating between a bold orange sparkly polish and the sweet sparkly pink one. And over again she said, "I'm just not bold enough to wear this color." 

How often do we use the "not enough" or "not at all" to base our decisions? I'm not bold enough, I'm not brave enough, not creative enough, not talented, not, not, not. Over and over again we use what we are not to base our choices. But is that the best way? 

Should we really make our decisions with what we aren't as our motivation? Would it be better to make our choices based on who are are or what we actually like? I prefer pink to orange so I'm going with the pink polish vs. I'm not bold enough for this color. I really enjoy watching people perform so I'm not going to be in the talent show vs I'm not talented enough to be up on the stage. 

Maybe it's because it's easier to know what we aren't rather than who we are. It's easier to say I'm not than to admit that who we are may just not conform to societal norms. And is it really kind to constantly point out what we are not. Are we hurting ourselves as we do this?