Tuesday, May 7, 2019

Social media and the lies we tell oursleves

Let's set the scene, if I had to guess it's pretty familiar to most of us: it's early in the morning, maybe you just woke up, and you pull out your phone. You open Instagram or Facebook and start the 'oh so important' scroll, pause, double tap 'Like' over and over again. Then you see it: the happy couple announcing, "We're pregnant!" Or the new couple announcing, "I said yes!" Or the independent and free-spirited young adult, "Europe here I come!" Or my personal favorite the glowing mom of 3 who writes, "Everything is better organic!" You feel it yet? The sinking dread, the heavy hopelessness becuase they are so happy, their lives are so perfect, they have better kids, nicer jobs, more excitement and then you fill yourself up with that awful empty feeling, suddenly your day is already ruined and you haven't even left your bed yet.

There is no shame in admitting we've all been there. I know I have! It's one of the dangers of social media and the root of one lie we tell oursleves. Let me be clear, social media is not the villain in this story, nor is it the friends who share the happy moments in their lives, the enemy is you! *gasp* Shocker I know right?! Okay so it's not really you becuase that just causes more issues no it's the lies we tell oursleves. Here are 3 lies we tell oursleves and social media is right in the mix of 'em:

1. Comparison! Becuase of these happy posts and perfect pictures my friends have perfect lives and I don't. Comparison never leads to happiness! It is one of the adversaries tools to make you doubt your worth and value becuase of another person. We are unique individuals, no two lives look the same. Each and every person faces different challenges and trials, I promise you no one is immune. And deciding how perfect another person's life is based off what the shared most recently on Facebook isn't a fair judgement.

2. Posting my opinions and views influence change. This is a lazy way to live what you believe. Yeah it's great to post that you're pro-life or anti-guns or concerned about human trafficking, but no one takes a Facebook post seriously. I mean except for online trolls... that's another discussion entirely. If you want to influence change get out and volunteer! Donate to the causes you beleive in. Teach children, teens, adults the truths you believe in. Learn to public speak and tell the world why they should care. Sitting behind and screen and hitting the share button is great, I'm not saying you shouldn't. But I am saying that it doesn't change anything, the only way to promote change is to get up and off the phone and actually do something.

3. I can only post what's good online. Please don't misunderstand this one, I am not saying all your problems should be hung out to dry on your Facebook. But I am saying it's okay to be real online. It's okay to post a picture of your messy kids and still be grateful for your family. It's okay to post a selfie from the hospital as you get your I.V. treatment. It's okay to have friends post the pictures you didn't approve becuase someone will notice your double chin. No one is actually perfect in this life. We all have bad days and hard days and things we dont parade around to the rest of the world. That's okay! But just peeling back the curtain enough for someone to see the human in you is beautiful and should be shared.

*Just gonna acknowledge that this blog is as much a part of the silliness of social media as anything else. Believe me the irony is not lost!

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