Last new years I was an absolute goober and crawled myself under my table, put on "I'm wishing" from Snow White and gobbled up 12 gapes in under a minute in the hopes of improving my rather sorry attempt at a love life.
Well here we are a near 10 months later and yikes! See I met someone and he's so nice. Ugh he's like thoughtful and considerate and understanding. He thinks I'm so funny and when he laughs his whole body laughs. He's cute too don't think I haven’t noticed that. And it's really nice. And I like him.
But here's the thing much of my prior dating has been more of a thought experiment vs an actual thing. So it's a lot of long distance and phone calls and swooning at the imagined situations. But this? This feels real. Like we've been on... I don't even know anymore... 6 dates?... and they are so nice. And we talk and we laugh and we've held hands and I feel safe around him to be myself. Which is great and amazing but also scary because this feels real in a way I haven't experienced before.
So who knows what the future holds. Our path thus far has definitely been... complicated to say the least. But I'm so hopeful it's genuinely disgusting. Because what if this one is real? What if he chooses me? What if he doesn't? Oh yikes am I in trouble!
Anyway see you in a month when my heart has been shattered? Or maybe not.
